By Swinggcat – author of Real World Seduction
Myth #1: Being an Attractive Man Is
Always About Appealing To What
Women Say They Want
If you are one of those vehement supporters of
this myth, you should get a noose and hang
yourself - you'll be better off. Trying to get
a woman to like you by attempting to live up to
her ideal preferences in a man is a one way
ticket to transforming your ego into a
proverbial punching bag. Women prefer tall,
dark, handsome, rich men, packing dogs with
garden hose length and telephone pole girth.
Oh, furthermore, if you don't want to fall
short of their expectations you better be
lumbered with chiseled abs and a copious
bubble butt. If your rump isn't up to par,
you could always get silicon butt cheek
implants. But forewarning: Your
black-and-blue rear will be so sore that
you won't be able to sit down for a month.
As those of you know who have been reading my
newsletters and have read my book: Attraction
is not what a woman says she wants. If
attraction was what women say they prefer, then
I wouldn't know short, bald, fat, and broke
guys experiencing massive success with women.
But I do.
Attraction, contrary to this, is about you
creating the emotion inside women of wanting,
chasing, and reaching for more of you. Although
my short, bald, fat and broke Casanova buddies
don't fill the quota of the “ideal man,” they
do manage to generate the emotion inside women
of wanting, chasing, and reaching for more of
them. And this, my friend, is why they are
massively successful with women. The art of
creating this emotion in women is what I
call PRIZING. My book is chockfull of
different techniques for PRIZING women, some
of which are Open Loops, Tension Loops,
Challenging & Qualifying, and Meta-Frames.
One of the best things you can do to set the
groundwork for PRIZING women is to make them
strive to fill the quota of your ideal female.
So, when you're out with a woman, don't behave
like a spineless little worm, asking her
questions such as: “How am I doing with you?”
Instead, when she behaves in ways that go
against your standards and expectations of
women, let her know that she is losing points
with you - and losing points quickly!
Myth #2: If A Woman Is Of Higher
Value Than You She Is Not Allowed
To Be Attracted To You.
This one actually rings some truth. Let me
explain. If you see a woman and immediately,
in your mind, consecrate her as a Goddess
amongst Goddesses you must bow down to, you
are figuratively butt ramming yourself,
because you are setting the frame that she is
the Prize, not you. As those of you who have
read my book know, women do not feel
attraction for men who are not the PRIZE.
Viewing a woman you have just met as a Goddess
amongst Goddesses is fine, as long as you
perceive yourself as a God amongst Gods and
abstain from bowing down to her.
What is the lesson to be learned? Objective
value doesn't exist, only perceived value
does. Although women are usually not
attracted to men of lesser value than
themselves, you can do a lot to increase your
value. Whenever interacting with a woman, a
Meta-Frame - or underlying meaning - is
established, determining your value in
relation to hers. When you allow a woman's
perceived value to intimidate you, or make
you feel of lesser value than her, you are
unknowingly establishing the Meta-Frame that
she is the PRIZE, not you. So the key is to
stop fretting about some aspect of her being
of higher value than some aspect of you,
plundering you of your self-esteem. When
interacting with a woman, if you ever feel
ugly to her beauty or pedestrian to her
sophistication or like a retarded little
spaz to her sense of cool...or whatever,
change your focus of attention. See the
bigger picture. Realize that when first
meeting a woman you paint a picture in
your mind of who you think she is, based
on a few aspects you observe about her.
This picture usually ends up being way off
base. Learn to take control of your
perceptions: If you feel intimidated by her
beauty, imagine what she looks like in the
morning without her makeup; if her
sophistication renders you tongue-tied,
consider that she might be putting on an
act to impress you; if you start worrying
about how much older you are than her,
imagine how much worse she's going to
look when she's your age...and so on.
Myth # 3: If You Want To Attract
Women You Have To Act Like You
Enjoy And Are Interested In The
Things That They Enjoy
This pathetic little myth is really a
product of the collective dating advice for
men self-help books for sale at a bookstore
near you, touting men to develop the
personality of an obedient lapdog.
This myth couldn't be further from the
truth. Women are attracted to men, not
little puppy dogs.
Hypothetically speaking, let's say you are
dating a girl who has a thing for musical
kitsch: think Britney Spears or Christina
Aguilera. You, however, despise this kind
of music and would prefer the sound of
nails on a chalkboard to this crap. What
should you do: Prentend Britney's great
or tell her what you really think?
Although counterintuitive, pretending to
like something you don't genuinely
like is unattractive to women.
Likewise, having a willingness to express
what you hate can redound in women finding
you very attractive.
Exceptions, of course, do exist. For
example, specific activities have been
deemed by our culture as having a high
social value. You might, for example,
prefer reading comic books over
participating in these activities. There
could be consequences, however, to not
participating in them. In one of my
upcoming products, I touch on these
activities. I will probably publish a
newsletter in the near future addressing
these activities.
Furthermore, I am not suggesting that you
jettison all of a woman's interests and
tastes that you do not share. Doing this
will turn you into a creepy control freak
and you will probably end up becoming a very
unhappy, boring person. Only being around
people with the same interests and tastes as
you, will stifle your growth as a human
being - diversity is good. I personally love
to be around people who introduce me to
things I don't know a lot about. This is how
I develop new interests and grow as a human
being.
My gripe is with men faking an interest in
something as a means to get someone to like
them. Doing this is really handing your balls
over on a platter to the other person. Don't
do this. Don't give away your power. It is
one of the most unattractive qualities you
can possess.
Myth # 4: Women Don't Like Sex
And Will Only Sleep With You
After You Go Through Great
Lengths Courting Them.
This one really makes my skin crawl. My life
experience keeps reaffirming that beyond the
shadow of a doubt this myth doesn't even
contain a smattering of truth. Women love sex
and can be as aggressive as men when it come to
obtaining it.
If you doubt this, make some female friends who
are not interested in you. That way they won't
be concerned with how you judge them,
allowing them to shed their ladylike pretenses
and talk candidly about their sexuality.
Warning: This lurid peek into the female sexual
psyche might frighten you - it isn't for the
faint of heart. What you will find is that
women are as sexual as men…if not more. Also,
I wouldn't be surprised if these women told you
about how much fun quickies, one-night-stands,
and meaningless sex can be.
Many women hold off on sleeping with men
because they lest being judged as sluts. It can
be quite powerful to tease women about acting
sexually forward or aggressive towards you.
Acting genuinely concerned, though, about a
woman's sexual promiscuity can transform a
sexually adventurous woman into a frigid prude.
Most men I know who are unbelievable at quickly
getting women into bed have a knack for making
women feel comfortable expressing their
sexual habits and promiscuity (Note: This is,
of course, in the context of women you've just
met. You probably wouldn't want to encourage
this kind of promiscuity in your wife or
girlfriend).
Myth # 5: If You Aren't Currently
Good With Women You Probably
Aren't Going To Get Any Better.
Simply not true. I don't believe this myth for a
second. Over the years I have known many hopeless
sad-sack losers who no one believed in, transform
themselves into some of the most skilled
ladies men I have ever seen. In many cases these
guys ended up more skilled with women than natural
ladies men. This is probably because they had a
burning desire to get a foothold on this area of
their life.
This self sabotaging myth is disseminated
primarily by shrinks, guys who've had little
success with women, and ladies men.
I know a few guys who were told by their
psychiatrists that if they weren't good with
women, they probably weren't going to get
any better. And that they'd be better off
compromising by settling for a less than
desirable woman. One of these guys stopped
seeing his therapist and is now doing fantastic
with women. He gets a gold star for firing the
bastard.
Some guys down on their success with women will
try to feed you all sorts of negative rhetoric,
such as: “if you are not already successful with
women, you are not going to get any better.”
These guys will infect your mind. Avoid them
like the plague.
Some ladies men will try to mystify their
abilities by making you think that they are
blessed with some unattainable God-given
talent. Often times this is an attempt to
exalt their abilities at the expense of
your self-esteem. Don't take that crap.
You're better than that.
All of the disseminators of this myth are
thought viruses that will infect your mind,
sabotaging your self-esteem and future
opportunities with women. If you currently
have any of these people in your life,
KICK 'EM TO THE CURB.
It is an understatement to say that I believe
in you; I am convinced that you can succeed with
women. I have met and taught men of all walks of
life who have successfully turned their lives
around with women. No matter what your current
level of success with women is, I know you
strive to get to a higher level. Otherwise,
you wouldn't be reading this. I know you are
capable of achieving your goals with women and
I am going to help you get there. And if you
haven't already picked up a copy of my book,
do so. It's not written for losers looking to
cope with their unfortunate situation. It's
written for winners: People who are ready to
take the bull by the horns and start achieving
and living the success they dream about. At the
end of the day, $39.95 is a small price to pay
to be fully equipped with the tools you need to
start experiencing massive success with women.
So if you haven't already picked up my book, do
so now.
RealWorldSeduction
'Till next time,
Swinggcat
P.S.-If you have a success story you would like
to share, or a question you would like to ask,
or a comment you would like to make, please
email me at:
swinggcat@realworldseduction.com
Include the fist initial of your first and
last name. And include the country,
state/province, and city you live in.
This whole "learning" thing goes both ways,
you know! Oh, and be sure not to just hit
"reply" to this email, because I won't get
it!
Thanks!
______________________________________________
Copyright 2004 Superior Living Inc. All rights
reserved. Swinggcat and RealWorldSeduction are
trademarks of Superior Living Inc.
DatingTipsForMen publishes top dating, attraction, and seduction articles.
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Having Women In Your Life…
By Swinggcat – author of Real World Seduction
Hey Guys,
Today I’m going to share with you something that I talk about in my book. If you aren’t currently doing what I am about to tell you, DOING IT could increase your success with women a hundred and fifty percent…if not more.
Whether you are looking for one-night-stands, threesomes, an awesome girlfriend…or whatever, implementing what you’re about to learn will redound in a giant step towards your goal.
Whether you consider yourself to be a slithering lounge lizard, a prodigious Casanova, a stand up guy, or a dilapidated ejaculate, if you are not yet doing what I am about to tell you, doing it will turbo charge your current success with women.
NOT DOING what I’m about to tell you is one of the biggest roadblocks preventing men from ATTRACTING women.
What you are about to learn is probably nothing you haven’t already heard. It, however, is one of the most neglected skills – especially by guys learning how to ATTRACT and be more successful with women.
Before I tell you what this secret is, I am going to share a little story with you. When I first became serious about mastering, what I used to perceive as, the ego bruising “social minefields,” in order to succeed with the women I desired, I befriended many guys trying, as well, to get this area of their life out of the way.
Some of these guys considered themselves to be spineless little worms. Others thought of themselves as full blown Casanovas. And a few felt like Average Joes. Some were amazing at quickly getting women into bed; while a few, alas, couldn’t, even if their life depended on it, talk to a woman.
All of us became really close and formed a taskforce with one goal in mind: To become more successful with women. I made a lot of good friends, and witnessed a few of them do some amazing things, ranging from making out with women in bars to occasionally having sex with a woman they had just met.
Despite what looked to be great success, there was a dark, depressing cloud brooding over us: None of us had any female friends. Some of the group had female friends, but got rid of them, thinking that they would take away time from attracting women. A few had never had a female friend. When we went out we never were just hanging out. Our only goal was to generate attraction in women. We did not have a single morsel of interest interacting with women we felt weren’t ATTRACTED to us. When entering a bar, women could feel our hunter energy, a pack wolves waiting to attack. Even if one of us made out with a woman, the night would usually end with just us guys.
Are you starting to get what’s wrong with this picture?
Good.
In my book, Real World Seduction, I talk about the importance of making five female friends that fit the archetype of the sort of woman you strive to ATTRACT.
Before breaking down the reasons for making at least five female friends, I’m going to get crystal clear about what I mean by “making friends with women.”
If you’re someone who sits around with their female friends, giving each other hot pink manicures and pedicures, listening to their problems with men, you’re in big trouble. Being friends with women is not about you playing the big passive bottom in their “bitter at men” gang bang. The only exception to this is if you are gay. My point: Being friends with women is about treating them exactly how you treat your guy friends. Women know you are not their girlfriends. When you act like you are their girlfriend, they interpret it as an unconvincing pretense used to get into their pants.
To reiterate: Being friends with women is about acting the way you would around your guy friends.
Let’s discuss the reasons for making friends with women.
Reason # 1: You Will Be More Comfortable Around Women In General:
Men who don’t have female friends are usually nervous and uncomfortable around women, causing women to feel uncomfortable around them. When a woman picks this sort of man up by the proverbial scruff of his neck, and mercilessly tears him apart, like a cheaply wrought rag doll, he becomes nervous and uncomfortable in his own skin. This results in her becoming nervous and uncomfortable. In her book, this will take you straight to the top of the Creep-O-Meter.
Trying to make women feel comfortable around you when you are uncomfortable in your own skin is usually a losing battle – and often times leads to them feeling even more uncomfortable.
The best way I know to make women feel comfortable is to become comfortable in your own skin and around women. The quickest road I know to becoming comfortable in your own skin and around women is to make female friends.
Reason # 2: You Will No Longer Need An Endless Supply Of Pick Up Lines And Memorized Material To Be Successful With Women:
I know some guys who are amazing at approaching women and initially getting women attracted to them but as soon as they run out of rehearsed material, things take a floundering turn for the awkward as they buckle completely. One common scenario is that a guy will meet a woman and succeed in generating the emotion inside her of wanting, chasing, and reaching for more of him through using memorized material. She willingly gives him her number. When he calls she has jamais vu (jamais vu is the opposite of déjà vu: it is the illusion that you are encountering something you have already experienced for the first time). It is like she is talking to a total stranger and the emotion of her feeling attraction towards him is long gone. Since he doesn’t know what to do outside the realm of using memorized material, she treats him like a random telemarketer trying to solicit her, cutting the phone call abnormally short and hanging up. The problem is that this guy neither understands women nor knows how to act around them. One of the best ways for developing these skills is by being friends with women – especially the type you strive to succeed with. Once you have taken the time to implement the skills you learned from my book in the real world and have made a few female friends, you’ll start to notice something cool happening in your interactions with women: After talking to a woman for a few minutes you’ll know exactly how to generate attraction with her, without having to use rehearsed material. I’m not against using memorized material – in fact, I’m a fan of it. But if you can only interact with women using memorized material, you are in big trouble.
Reason # 3: Women Know When A Man Is Not Frequently Around Other Women:
Women are clairvoyant when comes to knowing whether or not a man is frequently around women. Women assume that if other females hang around you, then you must be a cool guy. They assume, likewise, that if no females hang around you, something might be wrong with you – bad thing! This is pretty much herd mentality – go figure!
One of the big problems with a lot of the material on how to attract women is that it only focuses on making you feel more confident about yourself. As, alas, you might know, you can do all the affirmations in the world, but if you don’t have the social skills to attract women, your out of luck.
Another blunder guys make when learning how to attract women is only memorizing material to say to women. Only memorizing material without understanding why you are doing it is a makeshift solution to attracting and succeeding with women. By just memorizing a few pick up lines, you’re cheating yourself out of really learning how to attract women. My book has hundreds of powerful things to say to women. But these are only examples to help you learn the skills needed for attracting women. My belief is that people learn from a combination of explanation and examples. If you ever purchase a product on attracting women that only gives you explanations but no examples or examples – think pick up lines – but no explanations, you are being cheated – big time!
My book takes you through hundreds of real world examples and painstakingly breaks down the structure and purpose of these examples. If you put forth the effort studying my book, you will never have to memorize another person’s pick up lines or material again. Because you will understand the underlying structure behind generating attraction with women, allowing you to come up with your own material and lines. So if you haven’t picked up my book, do today!
RealWorldSeduction
**********************************************
Swinggcat responds to your emails:
Comment:
Hi Swinggcat,
Just to say BIG "thank you" for the amazing stuff you write – your posts, your book, the ideas….I’m still using your challenging and qualifying stuff without any significant changes and it works like a CHARM.
I think that you invented the formula all we need. Your system is really something completely new – as you say it is “swinggcat”.
And now my request: If you supply us with MORE of this kind of REAL-LIFE examples/stories you will PUSH the things much, much further in the right direction. I think what the guys really need is more of REAL seduction examples and less theory. (Please don’t think that I’m an advocate of the Outer Game thus ignoring the Inner one).
If I try to explain the principles of the internal combustion engine by the laws of physics and chemistry it will take me a lot of time to
draw the picture…however if I show you a short movie how it works without much explanation …you will get the picture almost
instantly…
And this is how your stuff works with women - INSTANTLY. When I run your method on a woman she starts looking amazed and in disbelieve, looses control and composure…and after awhile has no choice but surrender…
It’s Very similar with the seduction process provided that you have some basic understanding…The guys need the connection between something real in their mind(your real-life stories) and the reality in which they operate and they want to shape.
I have collected almost everything. I'm very well acquainted with all the seduction theories, methods
systems...etc currently existing and have to admit that your system looks like mount Everest compared to the rest ..
I consider it like a new religion and keep in mind that thousands and thousands of guys out there are awaiting your new fantastic real-life stuff… so
please keep up the good work and God bless you, MAN…
- A From California
My Comments:
Wow! – I’m glad you are having success using the material from my book. I know what I teach works because it has worked for me amongst many others.
You were successful because you took the time to master the techniques in my book – and I applaud you for that. I think the success you are starting to taste is something that is attainable to many other guys, if they only took the time to master these techniques.
About Real World Seduction/Swinggcat Method being a Religion: Well, in no way do I consider what I teach a religion. I am just some guy who has a lot of experience with women. And, at least I feel, has figured some things out about them that others haven’t.
Then again – maybe if I turn it into a religion I can get a nice tax break!
Comment:
Maybe I'm being a bit premature here, since I have not had a chance to use your stuff yet (I just received it less than 24 hours ago and spent my nightshift at work reading the bulk of it), but your SH -T is SWEEET!!!
I was skeptical about ordering your eBook because I've ordered a few seduction manuals in the past (3 to 5 especially over the past 21/2 months) and I've gotten very minimal results.
Now don't get me wrong...some of the other manuals that I've ordered I think have some merit to them; They have their own terminology which is pretty much equivalent to your stages of Attraction. But, where I have failed in the past in getting these women over these past several months is, I think, at the attraction and close stage.
I have consistently had all the girls that I've set up a date – sorry, meeting with - flake on me (A few of them whom I’ve been acquainted with for a few months or so, and one which I thought was in the bag, as early as yesterday…Can you believe that mutherf – ckin’ SH -T!!!). A lot of the other manuals, in my opinion do not give great concrete examples or examples to work with.
My problem is with the Attraction stage. I can never get them to follow through on their commitment to meet up with me. If I could do that, then I think I could fumble my way through a successful close or non-successful close; but I need the experience of getting past that Attraction stage so I will eventually, no doubt in my mind, become successful at closing these women; My efforts are always frustrated coming out of the starting block.
Reading your examples of Prizing, with the Sub-Headings consisting of:
1. Open Loops
2. Pushing & Pulling
3. Revealing & Concealing
4. Undermining
And then following up with Qualifying & Challenging, is wicked to the point of Evil!!! I feel a sense of renewed hope in succeeding at the Attraction Stage (My personal weak point), and I can’t wait to try them out!
Whether It’s your system by itself, or using it in conjunction with other systems (which I aforementioned earlier, is meritorious in their own way), I am confident that I, and any other User will kick ASS!!!
Sorry for the long email. I felt inspired at this moment to write it, and anything less than what is presented would do you, the reader, and me any injustice if the full background story was presented.
Anyway, Thanks again, and I will keep you updated on my future successes.
- Ray from Canada
My Comments:
Thank you for the compliments. Now go out and start getting the success you deserve.
Question:
First off I just want to say I have been reading your book, and although I am not finished yet, the information in it so far has been awesome. Your book fills in the holes that others left out. Instead of giving vague references on what to do, you spell it all out in detail. I have come to a point where I am no longer taking things personally; but now that I can get a number fairly easily I have come to another stumbling block. I find that even though I may ask for an email the woman will say, "no, here take my number instead", so now I'm thinking cool. But, when I call these women they don't return phone calls or act cold and standoffish, the opposite of how they were in person. Am I missing something? I cannot see myself as being the PRIZE if the woman already has the power because I'm calling her, and she can act rude, ignore, or not even return calls (the woman has already established the frame/meta-frame). In a way she forces a man to chase her. I know I have read books that say persistence, but when is enough enough. Is there another way?
I think this is a very important question that most men have trouble with.
Thanks in advance for your help.
G in Texas
My Comments:
Your doing awesome. I really, though, need more info to answer your question.
How long are you waiting to call these women? As a general rule DON’T wait too long to call her. Calling too soon can make you look needy, but waiting too long is usually worse. If, for example, you met and generated attraction with a woman five days ago, she has probably already interacted with several guys who she also was attracted to since that day. My point: Five days is an eternity in her world in which you have probably been long forgotten, my man. Since I have been doing this stuff for awhile, and I can leave quite an impression on women, I call when I feel like it. Remember: agonizing over whether or not a woman sees you as the PRIZE, is a form you chasing her – of her being the PRIZE in the interaction. Not caring what a woman thinks of you can be very powerful!
Also, as I said earlier in this newsletter, women sometimes have jamais vu. Even if when first meeting them you manage to generate the emotion in them of wanting, chasing, and reaching for more of you, by the time you talk to them on the phone this emotion might be long gone and forgotten. So you have to reignite this emotion in them. I have ways of doing this. Maybe I’ll do a whole newsletter on countering jamais vu.
The other possibility is that there is plenty of attraction there, but that women don’t feel comfortable enough to take that call to action with you. There are a lot of guys who can generate attraction with women but fail to create the comfort, allowing her take action.
A caveat: Making a woman comfortable is less about using particular lines or strategies and more about feeling comfortable in your own skin and with women, believing that you deserve beautiful women, taking a strong lead, and assuming that she wants to do what you want her to – be it having sex with you, having a threesome with you, going on a date with you…or whatever. In fact, most of the available lines and strategies used to make women feel comfortable taking action either end up making women feel more uncomfortable or kill the attraction all together if you have not mastered the aforementioned things. So if you want to be more than the cheesy guy in the bar who has a couple good memorized lines and become the sort of man women not only feel attraction towards but want to be around, pick up my book today.
RealWorldSeduction
'Till next time,
Swinggcat
P.S. – I recently started an affiliate program where I am giving high commissions on sales generated by my affiliates. Also, if you are approved as an affiliate, you get free products. So, if you have been enjoying my book and newsletters, and you run a website where you think your visitors would be interested in my book, sign up for my affiliate program.
http://realworldseduction.directtrack.com/
P.S.S.-If you have a success story you would like to
share, or a question you would like to ask, or a
comment you would like to make, please email me at:
swinggcat@realworldseduction.com
Include the fist initial of your first and last
name. And include the country, state/province,
and city you live in.
This whole "learning" thing goes both ways, you
know! Oh, and be sure not to just hit "reply" to
this email, because I won't get it!
Thanks!
______________________________________________
Copyright 2004 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved.
Swinggcat and RealWorldSeduction are trademarks of
Superior Living Inc.
DatingTipsForMen publishes top dating, attraction, and seduction articles.
Hey Guys,
Today I’m going to share with you something that I talk about in my book. If you aren’t currently doing what I am about to tell you, DOING IT could increase your success with women a hundred and fifty percent…if not more.
Whether you are looking for one-night-stands, threesomes, an awesome girlfriend…or whatever, implementing what you’re about to learn will redound in a giant step towards your goal.
Whether you consider yourself to be a slithering lounge lizard, a prodigious Casanova, a stand up guy, or a dilapidated ejaculate, if you are not yet doing what I am about to tell you, doing it will turbo charge your current success with women.
NOT DOING what I’m about to tell you is one of the biggest roadblocks preventing men from ATTRACTING women.
What you are about to learn is probably nothing you haven’t already heard. It, however, is one of the most neglected skills – especially by guys learning how to ATTRACT and be more successful with women.
Before I tell you what this secret is, I am going to share a little story with you. When I first became serious about mastering, what I used to perceive as, the ego bruising “social minefields,” in order to succeed with the women I desired, I befriended many guys trying, as well, to get this area of their life out of the way.
Some of these guys considered themselves to be spineless little worms. Others thought of themselves as full blown Casanovas. And a few felt like Average Joes. Some were amazing at quickly getting women into bed; while a few, alas, couldn’t, even if their life depended on it, talk to a woman.
All of us became really close and formed a taskforce with one goal in mind: To become more successful with women. I made a lot of good friends, and witnessed a few of them do some amazing things, ranging from making out with women in bars to occasionally having sex with a woman they had just met.
Despite what looked to be great success, there was a dark, depressing cloud brooding over us: None of us had any female friends. Some of the group had female friends, but got rid of them, thinking that they would take away time from attracting women. A few had never had a female friend. When we went out we never were just hanging out. Our only goal was to generate attraction in women. We did not have a single morsel of interest interacting with women we felt weren’t ATTRACTED to us. When entering a bar, women could feel our hunter energy, a pack wolves waiting to attack. Even if one of us made out with a woman, the night would usually end with just us guys.
Are you starting to get what’s wrong with this picture?
Good.
In my book, Real World Seduction, I talk about the importance of making five female friends that fit the archetype of the sort of woman you strive to ATTRACT.
Before breaking down the reasons for making at least five female friends, I’m going to get crystal clear about what I mean by “making friends with women.”
If you’re someone who sits around with their female friends, giving each other hot pink manicures and pedicures, listening to their problems with men, you’re in big trouble. Being friends with women is not about you playing the big passive bottom in their “bitter at men” gang bang. The only exception to this is if you are gay. My point: Being friends with women is about treating them exactly how you treat your guy friends. Women know you are not their girlfriends. When you act like you are their girlfriend, they interpret it as an unconvincing pretense used to get into their pants.
To reiterate: Being friends with women is about acting the way you would around your guy friends.
Let’s discuss the reasons for making friends with women.
Reason # 1: You Will Be More Comfortable Around Women In General:
Men who don’t have female friends are usually nervous and uncomfortable around women, causing women to feel uncomfortable around them. When a woman picks this sort of man up by the proverbial scruff of his neck, and mercilessly tears him apart, like a cheaply wrought rag doll, he becomes nervous and uncomfortable in his own skin. This results in her becoming nervous and uncomfortable. In her book, this will take you straight to the top of the Creep-O-Meter.
Trying to make women feel comfortable around you when you are uncomfortable in your own skin is usually a losing battle – and often times leads to them feeling even more uncomfortable.
The best way I know to make women feel comfortable is to become comfortable in your own skin and around women. The quickest road I know to becoming comfortable in your own skin and around women is to make female friends.
Reason # 2: You Will No Longer Need An Endless Supply Of Pick Up Lines And Memorized Material To Be Successful With Women:
I know some guys who are amazing at approaching women and initially getting women attracted to them but as soon as they run out of rehearsed material, things take a floundering turn for the awkward as they buckle completely. One common scenario is that a guy will meet a woman and succeed in generating the emotion inside her of wanting, chasing, and reaching for more of him through using memorized material. She willingly gives him her number. When he calls she has jamais vu (jamais vu is the opposite of déjà vu: it is the illusion that you are encountering something you have already experienced for the first time). It is like she is talking to a total stranger and the emotion of her feeling attraction towards him is long gone. Since he doesn’t know what to do outside the realm of using memorized material, she treats him like a random telemarketer trying to solicit her, cutting the phone call abnormally short and hanging up. The problem is that this guy neither understands women nor knows how to act around them. One of the best ways for developing these skills is by being friends with women – especially the type you strive to succeed with. Once you have taken the time to implement the skills you learned from my book in the real world and have made a few female friends, you’ll start to notice something cool happening in your interactions with women: After talking to a woman for a few minutes you’ll know exactly how to generate attraction with her, without having to use rehearsed material. I’m not against using memorized material – in fact, I’m a fan of it. But if you can only interact with women using memorized material, you are in big trouble.
Reason # 3: Women Know When A Man Is Not Frequently Around Other Women:
Women are clairvoyant when comes to knowing whether or not a man is frequently around women. Women assume that if other females hang around you, then you must be a cool guy. They assume, likewise, that if no females hang around you, something might be wrong with you – bad thing! This is pretty much herd mentality – go figure!
One of the big problems with a lot of the material on how to attract women is that it only focuses on making you feel more confident about yourself. As, alas, you might know, you can do all the affirmations in the world, but if you don’t have the social skills to attract women, your out of luck.
Another blunder guys make when learning how to attract women is only memorizing material to say to women. Only memorizing material without understanding why you are doing it is a makeshift solution to attracting and succeeding with women. By just memorizing a few pick up lines, you’re cheating yourself out of really learning how to attract women. My book has hundreds of powerful things to say to women. But these are only examples to help you learn the skills needed for attracting women. My belief is that people learn from a combination of explanation and examples. If you ever purchase a product on attracting women that only gives you explanations but no examples or examples – think pick up lines – but no explanations, you are being cheated – big time!
My book takes you through hundreds of real world examples and painstakingly breaks down the structure and purpose of these examples. If you put forth the effort studying my book, you will never have to memorize another person’s pick up lines or material again. Because you will understand the underlying structure behind generating attraction with women, allowing you to come up with your own material and lines. So if you haven’t picked up my book, do today!
RealWorldSeduction
**********************************************
Swinggcat responds to your emails:
Comment:
Hi Swinggcat,
Just to say BIG "thank you" for the amazing stuff you write – your posts, your book, the ideas….I’m still using your challenging and qualifying stuff without any significant changes and it works like a CHARM.
I think that you invented the formula all we need. Your system is really something completely new – as you say it is “swinggcat”.
And now my request: If you supply us with MORE of this kind of REAL-LIFE examples/stories you will PUSH the things much, much further in the right direction. I think what the guys really need is more of REAL seduction examples and less theory. (Please don’t think that I’m an advocate of the Outer Game thus ignoring the Inner one).
If I try to explain the principles of the internal combustion engine by the laws of physics and chemistry it will take me a lot of time to
draw the picture…however if I show you a short movie how it works without much explanation …you will get the picture almost
instantly…
And this is how your stuff works with women - INSTANTLY. When I run your method on a woman she starts looking amazed and in disbelieve, looses control and composure…and after awhile has no choice but surrender…
It’s Very similar with the seduction process provided that you have some basic understanding…The guys need the connection between something real in their mind(your real-life stories) and the reality in which they operate and they want to shape.
I have collected almost everything. I'm very well acquainted with all the seduction theories, methods
systems...etc currently existing and have to admit that your system looks like mount Everest compared to the rest ..
I consider it like a new religion and keep in mind that thousands and thousands of guys out there are awaiting your new fantastic real-life stuff… so
please keep up the good work and God bless you, MAN…
- A From California
My Comments:
Wow! – I’m glad you are having success using the material from my book. I know what I teach works because it has worked for me amongst many others.
You were successful because you took the time to master the techniques in my book – and I applaud you for that. I think the success you are starting to taste is something that is attainable to many other guys, if they only took the time to master these techniques.
About Real World Seduction/Swinggcat Method being a Religion: Well, in no way do I consider what I teach a religion. I am just some guy who has a lot of experience with women. And, at least I feel, has figured some things out about them that others haven’t.
Then again – maybe if I turn it into a religion I can get a nice tax break!
Comment:
Maybe I'm being a bit premature here, since I have not had a chance to use your stuff yet (I just received it less than 24 hours ago and spent my nightshift at work reading the bulk of it), but your SH -T is SWEEET!!!
I was skeptical about ordering your eBook because I've ordered a few seduction manuals in the past (3 to 5 especially over the past 21/2 months) and I've gotten very minimal results.
Now don't get me wrong...some of the other manuals that I've ordered I think have some merit to them; They have their own terminology which is pretty much equivalent to your stages of Attraction. But, where I have failed in the past in getting these women over these past several months is, I think, at the attraction and close stage.
I have consistently had all the girls that I've set up a date – sorry, meeting with - flake on me (A few of them whom I’ve been acquainted with for a few months or so, and one which I thought was in the bag, as early as yesterday…Can you believe that mutherf – ckin’ SH -T!!!). A lot of the other manuals, in my opinion do not give great concrete examples or examples to work with.
My problem is with the Attraction stage. I can never get them to follow through on their commitment to meet up with me. If I could do that, then I think I could fumble my way through a successful close or non-successful close; but I need the experience of getting past that Attraction stage so I will eventually, no doubt in my mind, become successful at closing these women; My efforts are always frustrated coming out of the starting block.
Reading your examples of Prizing, with the Sub-Headings consisting of:
1. Open Loops
2. Pushing & Pulling
3. Revealing & Concealing
4. Undermining
And then following up with Qualifying & Challenging, is wicked to the point of Evil!!! I feel a sense of renewed hope in succeeding at the Attraction Stage (My personal weak point), and I can’t wait to try them out!
Whether It’s your system by itself, or using it in conjunction with other systems (which I aforementioned earlier, is meritorious in their own way), I am confident that I, and any other User will kick ASS!!!
Sorry for the long email. I felt inspired at this moment to write it, and anything less than what is presented would do you, the reader, and me any injustice if the full background story was presented.
Anyway, Thanks again, and I will keep you updated on my future successes.
- Ray from Canada
My Comments:
Thank you for the compliments. Now go out and start getting the success you deserve.
Question:
First off I just want to say I have been reading your book, and although I am not finished yet, the information in it so far has been awesome. Your book fills in the holes that others left out. Instead of giving vague references on what to do, you spell it all out in detail. I have come to a point where I am no longer taking things personally; but now that I can get a number fairly easily I have come to another stumbling block. I find that even though I may ask for an email the woman will say, "no, here take my number instead", so now I'm thinking cool. But, when I call these women they don't return phone calls or act cold and standoffish, the opposite of how they were in person. Am I missing something? I cannot see myself as being the PRIZE if the woman already has the power because I'm calling her, and she can act rude, ignore, or not even return calls (the woman has already established the frame/meta-frame). In a way she forces a man to chase her. I know I have read books that say persistence, but when is enough enough. Is there another way?
I think this is a very important question that most men have trouble with.
Thanks in advance for your help.
G in Texas
My Comments:
Your doing awesome. I really, though, need more info to answer your question.
How long are you waiting to call these women? As a general rule DON’T wait too long to call her. Calling too soon can make you look needy, but waiting too long is usually worse. If, for example, you met and generated attraction with a woman five days ago, she has probably already interacted with several guys who she also was attracted to since that day. My point: Five days is an eternity in her world in which you have probably been long forgotten, my man. Since I have been doing this stuff for awhile, and I can leave quite an impression on women, I call when I feel like it. Remember: agonizing over whether or not a woman sees you as the PRIZE, is a form you chasing her – of her being the PRIZE in the interaction. Not caring what a woman thinks of you can be very powerful!
Also, as I said earlier in this newsletter, women sometimes have jamais vu. Even if when first meeting them you manage to generate the emotion in them of wanting, chasing, and reaching for more of you, by the time you talk to them on the phone this emotion might be long gone and forgotten. So you have to reignite this emotion in them. I have ways of doing this. Maybe I’ll do a whole newsletter on countering jamais vu.
The other possibility is that there is plenty of attraction there, but that women don’t feel comfortable enough to take that call to action with you. There are a lot of guys who can generate attraction with women but fail to create the comfort, allowing her take action.
A caveat: Making a woman comfortable is less about using particular lines or strategies and more about feeling comfortable in your own skin and with women, believing that you deserve beautiful women, taking a strong lead, and assuming that she wants to do what you want her to – be it having sex with you, having a threesome with you, going on a date with you…or whatever. In fact, most of the available lines and strategies used to make women feel comfortable taking action either end up making women feel more uncomfortable or kill the attraction all together if you have not mastered the aforementioned things. So if you want to be more than the cheesy guy in the bar who has a couple good memorized lines and become the sort of man women not only feel attraction towards but want to be around, pick up my book today.
RealWorldSeduction
'Till next time,
Swinggcat
P.S. – I recently started an affiliate program where I am giving high commissions on sales generated by my affiliates. Also, if you are approved as an affiliate, you get free products. So, if you have been enjoying my book and newsletters, and you run a website where you think your visitors would be interested in my book, sign up for my affiliate program.
http://realworldseduction.directtrack.com/
P.S.S.-If you have a success story you would like to
share, or a question you would like to ask, or a
comment you would like to make, please email me at:
swinggcat@realworldseduction.com
Include the fist initial of your first and last
name. And include the country, state/province,
and city you live in.
This whole "learning" thing goes both ways, you
know! Oh, and be sure not to just hit "reply" to
this email, because I won't get it!
Thanks!
______________________________________________
Copyright 2004 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved.
Swinggcat and RealWorldSeduction are trademarks of
Superior Living Inc.
DatingTipsForMen publishes top dating, attraction, and seduction articles.
Frames, Games, and Prizability…
By Swinggcat- author of Real World Seduction
Hey Guys,
A while back someone emailed me a great success story. I saved it on my computer and forgot about it. Last week I was going through my computer and found it. I thought, “Wow! - this is a really great story,” and was planning on using it in my last newsletter. But, then, as I was reading through it, I thought to myself, “there is so much good stuff going on here, I could do a whole newsletter on it.” And that’s exactly what I’m doing. Enjoy!
“Hey Swinggcat! There once was a time when I would walk into a bar, look at all the beautiful women having fun with guys who were NOT me, and get depressed. So I’d start drinking, and that would only make me more depressed. Eventually I’d go home alone, hating the world, hating women, and most of all, hating myself for not even TRYING to have fun.
Bars and clubs can be an intimidating environment. Until recently, it wasn’t in my reality to believe that I could actually make out with a girl in either location. Sure, I’d seen guys do it before, but to think that *I* could was just beyond any logical reasoning my mind could grasp.
But in reading through Swinggcat’s book, there was a chapter that really stuck out at me. That was the chapter on FRAMES. As Swinggcat defines it, a frame determines the underlying meaning of behaviors and actions.
I’ve found this is a *key* concept in understanding any interaction with women.
When you enter a situation you may feel uncomfortable with, the natural inclination is to be overwhelmed by the FRAME your environment presents. If you allow this to happen, you effectively give up any control over your behaviors and actions. This is the worst possible thing you can do if you are hoping to meet the girl of your dreams. Controlling your FRAME, and setting the right FRAME, as opposed to adopting the FRAMES presented to you, is the most powerful tool there is in getting a woman.
Allow me to demonstrate what I mean.
I was recently in a very trendy club in Los Angeles. It was the kind with some low level celebrities, some incredibly beautiful women, some incredibly rich men, sexy go-go dancers swinging around on poles, trendy techno music, and tastefully pornographic movies projected on the walls. In short: IT WAS THE MOST INTIMIDATING ENVIRONMENT KNOWN TO MAN!
So there I am, a guy who’s about 50 lbs. overweight, who’s bald, and who makes $30 Grand a year, hob-knobbing with models and porno stars. And wouldn’t you know it, the same feeling I got when I went to a bar in the past began to creep up on me. But because I was able to understand the concept of controlling my FRAME, I was able to do something amazing.
I set the frame that I’m having a good time, that all the girls in the club liked me, and that I was going to have fun with them. Before long, I found myself in a conversation with a beautiful girl who is a model. In fact, she told me she’s going to be on the next season of “America’s Next Top Model.” Because I approached her with a strong frame of having fun and that I was the PRIZE, she was very responsive to me. She eventually got dragged away by some friends (as is apt to happen in clubs). But later on, I saw her talking to a group of guys who were obviously trying to hit on her.
But because my frame was so strong, I walked up to the group, took her by the hand, and literally LEAD her onto the dance floor, away from all the moes she was talking to, who watched in stunned silence and a poor, bald, fat guy grinded away with this amazing girl in front of them. And not only that – SHE WAS INTO IT!
So there I am, body pressed up against this girl, having the best time in the world, and I think to myself “I should make out with her!”
So I did. I grabbed her and planted one right on her lips. And not only did she react well, but she reciprocated! Before long, our tongues were in a fencing match with each other, and I was the envy of about 78% of the club. It was a reality shattering experience for me, because until that point, the only place I’d ever made out with a girl was either in my car or in the bedroom after about 3 or 4 dates.
So what was different? The answer: My Frame! I set the frame where I was the PRIZE, where she was trying to win ME over, and where she wants me so bad that she WANTED to make-out with me. And because I set the strong frame, the model I was with WENT ALONG WITH IT! Now, I can now go into a club without that sinking feeling of depression dragging me down, because I know it is possible to not only have fun, but to meet any girl I want and make-out with her! You just gotta have the right frame.
Thanks Swinggcat!”
- M from Pasadena
My response:
Damn! – talk about a geek to sheik story. This guy went from “classified gimp” to “certified pimp.” What was is it that allowed him to do this? The sole enabling factor was this: He understood the power of ESTABLISHING himself as the PRIZE when interacting with women. In my book I call this PRIZABILITY.
As those of you who have been following my newsletters and have read my book know: ATTRACTION is not what a woman prefers. ATTRACTION is creating the emotion inside a woman of wanting, reaching for more of you. The art of creating this emotion inside women is what call PRIZING.
You cannot, however, create the emotion in a woman of her wanting and reaching for more of you if she does not perceive you as being the PRIZE. Put in other words, before you can ATTRACT her, you need to set the groundwork that you are the PRIZE. You can’t make a woman want more of you if she does not view you as having any perceived value.
Even having good looks and lots of money, in and of themselves, doesn’t necessarily suffice in establishing that you are the PRIZE with women.
A more efficient way of ESTABLISHING yourself as the PRIZE is through developing specific social skills. Learning to, for example, tell stories, cold read, be intriguing, develop your sense of humor…and so on. I do all of these things, and, in fact, I teach them in my book.
RealWorldSeduction
The most powerful way, however, to establish PRIZABILITY is to ALWAYS define the underlying meaning of your interactions with women as you being the one who is the PRIZE. In my book I call this the META-FRAME.
In fact, all of the other methods for establishing PRIZABILITY- such as, telling stories, cold reading, being intriguing, saying something funny…and so on – only work in conjunction with you defining the META-FRAME as you being the PRIZE.
If you are doing a bunch of things to try to establish your PRIZABILITY with a woman – such as, story telling and acting funny – but you are not defining the underlying meaning of your interaction with her as you being the one who is the PRIZE, you will, unknowingly, establish negative PRIZABILITY.
Put in other words, doing or saying things to increase your PRIZABILTY within the context – or META-FRAME - of you not being the PRIZE will inevitably make you look needy, pathetic, and desperate.
Before learning anything else about dating or ATTRACTING women, you need to know how to ESTABLISH the META-FRAME that you are the PRIZE in the interaction. Even if you have all of the social skills in the world, without knowing how to set the META-FRAME your skills are worthless when comes to ATTRACTING women. If you do not yet have a handle on this, you need to read my book:
RealWorldSeduction
When you are fat, bald, and broke, like M from Pasadena, a woman’s default assumption is probably going to be that you are not the PRIZE. To make matters worse, your default assumption about yourself might be that you aren’t the PRIZE.
As M from Pasadena tells us: “When you enter a situation you may feel uncomfortable with, the natural inclination is to be overwhelmed by the FRAME your environment presents. If you allow this to happen, you effectively give up any control over your behaviors and actions. This is the worst possible thing you can do if you are hoping to meet the girl of your dreams. Controlling your FRAME, and setting the right FRAME, as opposed to adopting the FRAMES presented to you, is the most powerful tool there is in getting a woman.”
M refuses to allow society, his environment, and the people he is around to dictate his FRAME and META-FRAME.
Just doing this can establish PRIZABILITY because it conveys to women that you are in control of your power, have a strong sense of self, and have an unswayable REALITY. These are all qualities women find PRIZABLE in men.
M continues: “I set the frame where I was the PRIZE, where she was trying to win ME over, and where she wants me so bad that she WANTED to make-out with me. And because I set the strong frame, the model I was with WENT ALONG WITH IT! Now, I can now go into a club without that sinking feeling of depression dragging me down, because I know it is possible to not only have fun, but to meet any girl I want and make-out with her! You just gotta have the right frame.”
Let’s remember, he didn’t play tonsil hockey with just any girl, he did it with a woman who is going to be on the next season of “America’s Next Top Model.” And he was able to do this in spite of being fat, bald, and broke – all because he established the META-FRAME that he is the PRIZE.
When you ASSUME that you have perceived value, and KNOW how to establish the META-FRAME that you are the PRIZE, women will see you as a PRIZE they want to win over – and it doesn’t matter if you’re fat, or bald or broke…or whatever. If, however, you are good looking and rich yet do not have the skill set for establishing the META-FRAME that you are the PRIZE, your success with women will be mediocre at best. That’s how important the META-FRAME is. With some guys, it almost seems like they were born with it. Not me. I had to learn how to establish the META-FRAME through a lot of experimenting and hard work. If you want to save yourself truck loads of time, come check out my book and learn how to establish the META-FRAME within a few hours:
RealWorldSeduction
'Till next time,
Swinggcat
P.S. – I recently started an affiliate program where I am giving high commissions on sales generated by my affiliates. So, if you have been enjoying my book and newsletters, and you run a website where you think your visitors would be interested in my book, sign up for my affiliate program.
http://realworldseduction.directtrack.com/
P.S.S.-If you have a success story you would like to
share, or a question you would like to ask, or a
comment you would like to make, please email me at:
swinggcat@realworldseduction.com
Include the fist initial of your first and last
name. And include the country, state/province,
and city you live in.
This whole "learning" thing goes both ways, you
know! Oh, and be sure not to just hit "reply" to
this email, because I won't get it!
Thanks!
______________________________________________
Copyright 2004 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved.
Swinggcat and RealWorldSeduction are trademarks of
Superior Living Inc.
Demystifying Charisma…
By Swinggcat- author of Real World Seduction
Hey guys,
A few nights ago, I went barhopping with a friend of mine. We both talked to truck loads of women and used practically the same material on them. But by the end of the night my friend’s results were so bad he felt blessed with an unlikable self. My experience, however, was the total opposite. I felt like Satan with pitchfork in hand, inciting one girl after the next to engage in some naughty mirth. Is it because of my looks? Is it because I have some impalpable quality about me called “charisma,” which is not teachable? Is it because I am Satan? No – it is none of these things. It is a learned behavior no different than learning to tie your shoes. I know this because, similar to my friend, I spent years feeling like a boring sloth before transforming myself into a flittering butterfly charming one group of women to the next.
But before I reveal to you the skills that distinguish a charismatic Casanova from a floundering Waldo, I am going to give you a quick overview of my method, Naturalized Attraction
Naturalized Attraction is not about trying to apply therapeutic techniques used in psychology to dating, attracting, and seducing women. Nor is it based upon the unfounded claims propounded by the “let’s play pseudo-psychologist to the helpless, needy and pathetic” gurus of the world – think Dr. Phil!
The starting point of “Naturalized Attraction” is always the REAL WORLD. The method strives to observe, model, and improve upon both the natural social behaviors that generate attraction in women, and the glue that holds these behaviors together. Our culture has mystified this glue under the rubric “charisma” as an innate, intangible, non-teachable quality blessed individuals possess. “Charisma,” however, is actually the combination of a few learnable and repeatable skills.
So this begs the question: What skills constitute Charisma and how does a person go about acquiring these skills?
Two skills that play a mainstay in being charismatic are: owning your material, and having a strong intent. Let’s start with the first one, owning your material. There are a lot of men who cringe at the idea of having well rehearsed jokes and stories prepared for social interactions. You be might be one of these men. If so, think about this: Most socially adept people will unconsciously tell the same jokes and stories over and over again, honing them to perfection. Oftentimes, however, once a person is made conscious of, for example, using a rehearsed story, he begins to feel guilty for acting fake. This guilt is ludicrous. I have never met a single socially adept person who used completely new material in every social interaction. Purge your self of this guilt. Remember: Whether you are conscious of it or not, having at least some rehearsed material is part of having strong social skills.
Having well rehearsed material will allow you to simultaneously (1) display your own personality to the women increasing your PRIZABILITY in her eyes, and (2) to get your own head so you can observe both her and the situation. When you have well rehearsed material your brain power will not be expended on remembering, for example, a particular joke or story. Instead, you will have extra brain power to analyze what you need to do to further engage her.
One thing, though, I am bit fastidious about is using your own material. When it is your own material, even if it is rehearsed, it is authentic because you are displaying who you are. Even if you only have rehearsed a few minutes of memorized material, if it is about you, it won’t matter. But if you are using someone else’s material, you risk coming off as fake. I have seen guys who have an hour or so of memorized material, which is not their own. Once they are spent, so to speak, women usually loose interest in them. Probably the dramatic shift in personality makes women suspicious.
Having a strong intent also plays an important role in acting charismatic. A few years back, women would often times loose interest while talking to me or think that I that I was B.S.-ing them. The reason was that they were picking up on my weak intent. Even the girls lumbered with IQs barley into the double digits picked up on this weakness. My problem: I needed to develop a strong intent.
But what does it mean to have a strong intent? This is probability one of the most misunderstood terms out there. This is due to the follies of some psychological disciplines – such as, Neuro-Linguistic Programming – that fail to be precise when defining terminology. Having a strong intent is most commonly misunderstood as meaning: A congruency between a person’s external behaviors and his internal beliefs. This is, however, not the meaning but the symptom of having a strong intent.
Having a strong intent is congruently:
1) Having the desire and the will to do what needs to be done to achieve a particular outcome.
2) Having the unwavering belief that you will achieve the intended outcome.
If a person has the desire and the will to do what needs to be done to achieve a particular outcome but does not have the belief that he can achieve it, he will come across as needy. This used to be me. I had the desire and the will to do what needs to be done to achieve a particular outcome, but not believe or think that I deserve my desired outcome.
One thing that has helped me tremendously is rehearsing the outcome of everything I intend to get an effect from. So, for example, if I intend to tell a story to intrigue a woman, I will rehearse in my mind her being intrigued by my story. If, for example, intend have woman lean and try to kiss me after I have kissed her and pulled back, I will rehearse this over and over again in my mind.
When you are in an attraction flow – achieving one intended outcome to the next – the material qua tools for achieving these outcomes become transparent. When driving somewhere, for example, you barely even notice the car. All you are concerned with is getting to the desired place. It is only when, for example, you get a flat tire that you become conscious again of the car as a tool used to get you to your intended destination. Likewise, it only becomes obvious to you and the woman that you are trying to do something to get a particular outcome when something interrupts the attraction flow: stumbling over your words because you didn’t know your material, or not having the belief that you could get your intended outcome…or whatever.
But all of the intended outcomes we have been discussing – getting her intrigued, getting her to kiss you…and so on – are only tools to achieve the META-INTENT: Getting her to sleep with you.
When a person has mastered the attraction flow, everything becomes transparent except the fact that he and the woman are going to sleep together – they both know it is going to happen. When a woman encounters a man of this caliber, she will often speak about that quality she can’t quite put her finger on that drew her to him. In this culture we oftentimes classify this behavior as Charisma.
In reality it comes down to controlling the META-FRAME, and having both a stronger reality and META-INTENT than the woman you are attracting. All of this stuff is covered in my book or will be covered in some of my upcoming products. If you are ready to take your persuasion skills to the next level, come visit me:
http://www.realworldseduction.com/
'Till next time,
Swinggcat
P.S.-If you have a success story you would like to share, or a question you would like to ask, or a comment you would like to make, please email me at swinggcat@realworldseduction.com
Include the fist initial of your first and last name. And include the country, state/province, and city you live in.
This whole "learning" thing goes both ways, you know! Oh, and be sure not to just hit "reply" to this email, because I won't get it! Thanks!
Copyright 2004 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved. Swinggcat and RealWorldSeduction are trademarks of Superior Living Inc.
Hey guys,
A few nights ago, I went barhopping with a friend of mine. We both talked to truck loads of women and used practically the same material on them. But by the end of the night my friend’s results were so bad he felt blessed with an unlikable self. My experience, however, was the total opposite. I felt like Satan with pitchfork in hand, inciting one girl after the next to engage in some naughty mirth. Is it because of my looks? Is it because I have some impalpable quality about me called “charisma,” which is not teachable? Is it because I am Satan? No – it is none of these things. It is a learned behavior no different than learning to tie your shoes. I know this because, similar to my friend, I spent years feeling like a boring sloth before transforming myself into a flittering butterfly charming one group of women to the next.
But before I reveal to you the skills that distinguish a charismatic Casanova from a floundering Waldo, I am going to give you a quick overview of my method, Naturalized Attraction
Naturalized Attraction is not about trying to apply therapeutic techniques used in psychology to dating, attracting, and seducing women. Nor is it based upon the unfounded claims propounded by the “let’s play pseudo-psychologist to the helpless, needy and pathetic” gurus of the world – think Dr. Phil!
The starting point of “Naturalized Attraction” is always the REAL WORLD. The method strives to observe, model, and improve upon both the natural social behaviors that generate attraction in women, and the glue that holds these behaviors together. Our culture has mystified this glue under the rubric “charisma” as an innate, intangible, non-teachable quality blessed individuals possess. “Charisma,” however, is actually the combination of a few learnable and repeatable skills.
So this begs the question: What skills constitute Charisma and how does a person go about acquiring these skills?
Two skills that play a mainstay in being charismatic are: owning your material, and having a strong intent. Let’s start with the first one, owning your material. There are a lot of men who cringe at the idea of having well rehearsed jokes and stories prepared for social interactions. You be might be one of these men. If so, think about this: Most socially adept people will unconsciously tell the same jokes and stories over and over again, honing them to perfection. Oftentimes, however, once a person is made conscious of, for example, using a rehearsed story, he begins to feel guilty for acting fake. This guilt is ludicrous. I have never met a single socially adept person who used completely new material in every social interaction. Purge your self of this guilt. Remember: Whether you are conscious of it or not, having at least some rehearsed material is part of having strong social skills.
Having well rehearsed material will allow you to simultaneously (1) display your own personality to the women increasing your PRIZABILITY in her eyes, and (2) to get your own head so you can observe both her and the situation. When you have well rehearsed material your brain power will not be expended on remembering, for example, a particular joke or story. Instead, you will have extra brain power to analyze what you need to do to further engage her.
One thing, though, I am bit fastidious about is using your own material. When it is your own material, even if it is rehearsed, it is authentic because you are displaying who you are. Even if you only have rehearsed a few minutes of memorized material, if it is about you, it won’t matter. But if you are using someone else’s material, you risk coming off as fake. I have seen guys who have an hour or so of memorized material, which is not their own. Once they are spent, so to speak, women usually loose interest in them. Probably the dramatic shift in personality makes women suspicious.
Having a strong intent also plays an important role in acting charismatic. A few years back, women would often times loose interest while talking to me or think that I that I was B.S.-ing them. The reason was that they were picking up on my weak intent. Even the girls lumbered with IQs barley into the double digits picked up on this weakness. My problem: I needed to develop a strong intent.
But what does it mean to have a strong intent? This is probability one of the most misunderstood terms out there. This is due to the follies of some psychological disciplines – such as, Neuro-Linguistic Programming – that fail to be precise when defining terminology. Having a strong intent is most commonly misunderstood as meaning: A congruency between a person’s external behaviors and his internal beliefs. This is, however, not the meaning but the symptom of having a strong intent.
Having a strong intent is congruently:
1) Having the desire and the will to do what needs to be done to achieve a particular outcome.
2) Having the unwavering belief that you will achieve the intended outcome.
If a person has the desire and the will to do what needs to be done to achieve a particular outcome but does not have the belief that he can achieve it, he will come across as needy. This used to be me. I had the desire and the will to do what needs to be done to achieve a particular outcome, but not believe or think that I deserve my desired outcome.
One thing that has helped me tremendously is rehearsing the outcome of everything I intend to get an effect from. So, for example, if I intend to tell a story to intrigue a woman, I will rehearse in my mind her being intrigued by my story. If, for example, intend have woman lean and try to kiss me after I have kissed her and pulled back, I will rehearse this over and over again in my mind.
When you are in an attraction flow – achieving one intended outcome to the next – the material qua tools for achieving these outcomes become transparent. When driving somewhere, for example, you barely even notice the car. All you are concerned with is getting to the desired place. It is only when, for example, you get a flat tire that you become conscious again of the car as a tool used to get you to your intended destination. Likewise, it only becomes obvious to you and the woman that you are trying to do something to get a particular outcome when something interrupts the attraction flow: stumbling over your words because you didn’t know your material, or not having the belief that you could get your intended outcome…or whatever.
But all of the intended outcomes we have been discussing – getting her intrigued, getting her to kiss you…and so on – are only tools to achieve the META-INTENT: Getting her to sleep with you.
When a person has mastered the attraction flow, everything becomes transparent except the fact that he and the woman are going to sleep together – they both know it is going to happen. When a woman encounters a man of this caliber, she will often speak about that quality she can’t quite put her finger on that drew her to him. In this culture we oftentimes classify this behavior as Charisma.
In reality it comes down to controlling the META-FRAME, and having both a stronger reality and META-INTENT than the woman you are attracting. All of this stuff is covered in my book or will be covered in some of my upcoming products. If you are ready to take your persuasion skills to the next level, come visit me:
http://www.realworldseduction.com/
'Till next time,
Swinggcat
P.S.-If you have a success story you would like to share, or a question you would like to ask, or a comment you would like to make, please email me at swinggcat@realworldseduction.com
Include the fist initial of your first and last name. And include the country, state/province, and city you live in.
This whole "learning" thing goes both ways, you know! Oh, and be sure not to just hit "reply" to this email, because I won't get it! Thanks!
Copyright 2004 Superior Living Inc. All rights reserved. Swinggcat and RealWorldSeduction are trademarks of Superior Living Inc.
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